My First Annual Best and Worst Songs of the Year List -- 2011 Edition

First off, let me just say that I'm fully aware this isn't the most inclusive list. For example, there's no country, hip-hop, or dance/R&B music on it. I generally don't listen to anything besides rock and pop, so unless a song is awesome enough to catch my attention--like last year's "Single Ladies" by Beyonce or "D.J. Got Us Fallin' in Love" by Usher--it's not gonna make my list.

This year nothing outside my preferred genres piqued my interest. But all the pop & rock songs listed below are pretty great, I think.

TOP TEN BEST SONGS OF 2011:

10. "Lonely Boy" -- The Black Keys Completely rocking yet groovy at the same time, this song has a guitar riff that would make the Church Lady stand up and play air guitar.
9. "Brand New Day" -- Trevor Hall I don't know anything about this guy, but he's got a cool, throaty voice. And the song is super-feel-good.
8. "Cough Syrup" -- Young the Giant Chris Martin so wishes he wrote this catchy tune.
7. "Mr. Know It All" -- Kelly Clarkson I love a song that calls out a dude for being a jerk. Adding a great beat and Ms. Clarkson's powerful voice makes it pop perfection.
6. "The Last Living Rose" -- P.J. Harvey Ms. Harvey is one of my all-time favorite artists. This song is beautiful and haunting.

5. Tie: "The Calamity Song" and "This Is Why We Fight" -- The Decemberists Two interesting, expertly-constructed, and catchy tunes from the same album. I can't decide which one I like best.

4. "Holdin' on to Black Metal" -- My Morning Jacket Hiring an all-female choir to sing back-up on this song was brilliant. A bunch of hairy dudes + ladies in robes = pure magic.

3. "Lost in My Mind" -- The Head and the Heart The soaring harmonies in this song's chorus are spectacular. I smile every time I hear it.
2. "Pumped Out Kicks" -- Foster the People Even if I'm driving in my car when this awesome song comes on the radio, I can't help but dance and sing along. Watch out, highway patrol!

1. "Rolling in the Deep" -- Adele Yes, it was over-played and yes, Adele was over-exposed in 2011, but this song is pretty much perfect. I was completely blown away the first time I heard it...it deserves to be #1.

And since you can't have a "Best" list without a "Worst" one....

TOP FIVE WORST SONGS OF 2011:

5. "I Wanna Go" -- Britney Spears The worst Auto-Tune nightmare EVER.

4. "Moves Like Jagger" -- Maroon 5 I happen to like this band, which usually puts out delicious pop songs. Expecting more from them makes me extra-hate this one.

3. "Party Rock Anthem" -- LMFAO This joke-of-a-song was everywhere all year long. It just plain sucks. 

2. "Comeback Kid (That's My Dog)" -- Brett Dennen If I'm home when this stupid tune comes on the radio, I have to sprint across the room to turn it off. Dumb, dumb, dumb song. 

1. "Friday" -- Rebecca Black Putting this at #1 almost feels like a cop-out because it's so obvious. But the song is absolutely awful. You know the gory details, I don't need to explain myself.

That's my list...hope you enjoyed it. Maybe it even introduced you to a great song or two that you hadn't yet heard. If so, yay!

Happy 2012!

Deck the Halls (and Front Lawns, Steps, Porches, Shrubbery...)

The holiday season brings out the kid in all of us. That or the Grinch secretly residing in our soul. Luckily for me, it's the former.

I get really excited about Christmas--maybe even more so than my kids. After all, I'm the one who suggests we go get our Christmas tree pretty much before we've even digested the Thanksgiving turkey. It's me who blasts the Christmas tunes in the car and sings along at the top of my voice (while my three year old screams "STOP SINGING!" from the back seat). I'm the one who, on or around December 18th, can no longer stand the suspense and sheepishly asks my husband if the kids and I can open just one present.

And oh, how I love the houses all decorated with lights! I even get a kick out of the cheesy blow-ups. Though I refuse to put one of those monstrosities on our own lawn, that doesn't stop me from admiring them on our neighbors' properties.

One of the over-the-top houses in our neighborhood.

We--as in the members of our generation--seem so much more willing to embrace our inner-children than our parents were. I wonder why that is?

When we were little, my brothers and I would beg our parents to drive us around the town next to ours because the people who lived there really went crazy with the decorations. (Here's the formula: Middle-class town=excessive, tacky, wonderful decorations; upper-middle-class town: wreaths and candles in the windows.)

Nothing has really changed--it's still me begging to check out Christmas decorations...except now I end up begging my kids instead of my parents.

The other day, I was driving the kids home after a pediatrician's appointment. It was around 5 p.m. and pitch black already.

"Hey, kids! How about we drive around the neighborhood and look at some decorations?"

"Nah," my son chimes in from the back. "I just want to go home."

"Oh, c'mon, pleeeeeeeease?" I beg.

But guess what? I'm the one in the driver's seat now (literally and figuratively). So there. These days, when I say we're going to drive around and look at the pretty Christmas decorations then WE ARE DRIVING AROUND AND LOOKING AT PRETTY CHRISTMAS DECORATIONS, DAMN IT! Whether my kids like it or not. Ha!

Happy holidays, everyone!

Face Invaders

I've been looking forward to tomorrow night for a while now. The rugby team my husband played for for years is having their annual Awards/Get-Drunk-and-Crazy Dinner in the city. It was a fun event even when we lived in NYC pre-kids and went out all the time, but now that we can count on one hand the number of times we get out each year without the kids, it's downright exciting.

I will be wearing a pretty dress, heels, and mascara for the first time since summer.

So the cold sore that appeared on my upper lip a few days ago was less welcome than usual.

AAAHHHHHH, SUSAN!!! Why, why, why? This is SO YOU, just classic, gross Susan. Oh, there's an important event coming up? BAM! Cold sore!

You should hear me the week leading up to something fun (high-school reunion, Christmas party, tropical vacation, whatever); I begin reciting my pleasedon'tletmegetacoldsore, pleasedon'tletmegetacoldsore mantra. I'm not sure who I'm telling exactly because generally I'm not a prayer, but I figure begging and pleading can't hurt. (Hey, you never know who might be listening, though why they'd listen to me, I don't know.)

This week's cold sore got me thinking about my childhood and the dreaded SCHOOL PICTURE DAY. Because, inevitably, I'd get a cold sore beforehand and ruin the photo.

Oh, you think I'm exaggerating? Yeah, so did I at first. I thought maybe once I had a cold sore in a school picture and that time had distorted the memory. But then while at my parents' house over Thanksgiving, I decided to peruse some old photo albums.

And that's when I confronted The Horror (not in chronological order):

Super-cute pigtails...super-gross cold sore.

My mom calls this one my "Queen
Victoria" pose. I call it "Ugly Amish
girl with cold sore."

The smile is a hopeful one that says "Gee, I
hope my almost-but-not-quite-gone cold sore
doesn't show up in the picture!" No such
luck, Little Susan.

I loved that APPLE shirt. What I didn't love
was the cold sore that appeared on my face
 every year before Picture Day. (The glare
hides it but trust me it's there, bottom-right).

Mustard-colored 70's turtleneck=ugly
Mustard-colored turtleneck + cold sore=heinous

All five photos are from elementary school. And since I was in elementary school for a total of six years...well, you do the math. Okay, I'll do the math: over 80% of the time I had a cold sore in my school photo. That is craaaazy. And disgusting, painful, and embarrassing.

And humbling...definitely oh-so humbling.

"Everyone Is the Age of Their Heart." - Guatemalan Proverb

Ha-ha-ha, what a lie....

I think I might be having a mid-life crisis. All I know for sure is that I've been struggling lately, and I decided putting my thoughts and feelings down in words might help me sort it out. So please bear with me.

I've been feeling really nostalgic lately--not the good kind when you fondly remember past fun times, but the yucky kind when you feel not quite present in the present (if that makes any sense). I'm not nostalgic for any particular time or place or person, but rather I miss the way I used to be and feel and relate to the world.

Ahhh, those were the good ol' days. Too bad I didn't
appreciate it. "Youth is wasted on the young" as they say.

When I was younger, the way I looked played a big part in how I related to people--especially men, of course. A young woman's allure can be a useful and powerful thing. I wasn't one of those who used her looks to unfairly take advantage of a situation (unless the guy was a jerk and deserved it) but I certainly enjoyed the attention my appearance got me over the years. So shoot me. And there is no doubt a woman's allure can open doors.

Because the way I was treated was partially due to my appearance, of course how I looked became a significant part of my identity (as it does for most people, whether they admit it or not).

Now that I'm getting older, I feel myself teetering on the precipice of undesirable and this leaves me feeling a bit rudderless. While an older woman can "look good for her age," (and there's always that crushing "for her age" added on at the end) she will never again be a hot, young girl. An older woman is more experienced and (hopefully) wiser than her younger counterpart--and this is certainly something to celebrate--but it doesn't change the fact that she is no longer viewed as desirable by the world in general. And that sucks.

Nowadays when I walk past a construction site, I bristle in anticipation of the cat-call, but when it doesn't come, instead of feeling relieved I'm deflated. Life is more boring this way.

The questions I ask myself are these: What is my identity now? How do others see me (and do I really want to know)? What's my role in this world supposed to be? Yes, I'm a wife, mother, daughter, sister, etc., but who am I deep down inside?

All I know is, the girl I once was is no more and I miss her, hot mess that she was.

Does everyone have such problems as they age, or am I just vainer than most? My guess is it's about 50/50. Maybe it's especially difficult right now because it's only recently that I've started feeling, well, not old exactly...just not young anymore. Maybe, instead of getting worse as I age, I'll get used to feeling this way and it won't bother me as much?

I certainly hope so.